I Want To Believe
My mind’s pretty messed up and it’s not even a personal tragedy. Right now, I find myself at such a loss, emotionally, mentally and verbally.
I’m not a very emotional person but today, as my mind keeps turning back to Auie’s loss, I can’t help but suffer for her empathetically. I don’t think I can ever even imagine the pain of losing a child. I don’t know if I could say or do anything that would alleviate the pain of her loss but I really want to help her through this. I feel so inadequate . All I can do now is pray that things will get better somehow. I want so badly to believe everything will be all right even after such a loss.
Also last night, a suitor who relocated to the US texted me. He told me I was his dream girl. I got asked out by three guys this week but I’m only going out with one of them this Sunday. I can’t pretend that I don’t feel frustrated over being apathetic towards guys but then again, my problem is so trivial I believe that I can get through everything I’m facing right now.
Come to me now
And lay your hands over me
Even if it’s a lie
Say it will be alright
And I shall believeI’m broken in two
And I know you’re on to me
That I only come home
When I’m so all alone
But I do believeThat not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly you won’t give up on me
And I shall believe
And I shall believe– “I Shall Believe” by Sheryl Crow
