Knights In Shining Armor
NOTE: I admit, I am a big female sissy! Bwahahahahaha! ^_^
I was home alone last Wednesday evening. Originally, I thought it would be the perfect time to review for my Criminal Law midterms because of the peace and quiet of having the house all to myself. But no thanks to Gus and his scary elevator story, my imagination began working in overdrive… and in no time at all, I managed to scare myself silly inside my own home.
My parents and my brother went to an uncle’s wake and let me just tell you that I’m not that big of a scaredy cat. I love watching Asian horror movies with Gus, and I’m usually the type who’s perfectly content to stay home alone. But somehow that night, even as I tried hard to focus on studying, every other minute or so, I would give a start every sound I heard. Every sound got magnified into something scary and ominous. Each rustling noise had me thinking of burglars or ghosts, I was slowly and illogically driving myself nuts with fright!
I tried to reason with my hyperactive mind that the front door was locked so I’m perfectly safe but then again, my mind screamed back at me, “The gate is not locked you dimwit, what do you mean safe?!” I tried to read, I tried to watch TV, I turned on the radio, I locked myself in my room but it seemed to me that there was something ominous about to happen. I tried talking myself out of this self-inflicted paranoia but unfortunately my mind’s gotten ahead of my sensibilities, it was already imagining all sorts of scenarios, my heart was palpitating and worse, I can hear the music of psycho playing in my head!
I contemplated calling my parents to tell them to come home early but since it was family duty, it seemed trivial of me to demand that they go home immediately to assure my paranoia. I only had one option left or more likely one option with three choices.So swallowing my pride, I desperately sent an SOS text message to three beings whom I fervently hoped were kindhearted and interesting to drive me to distraction. And guess what, all three of them heeded my call. ^_^ Read the rest of this entry »
Nostalgia
When the past becomes present…
lisa_simpson: so he was ur one big crush in college… had one too…
joan_g1014: yeah!
lisa_simpson: yeah and u said in ur blog, mejo parang gusto ka din ng guy
joan_g1014: so when he called me that night, he confessed he liked me
joan_g1014: i didn’t say anything—i couldn’t say anything to be exact
joan_g1014: but i was thrilled
joan_g1014: but season pa so i just passed it off as a joke
joan_g1014: then there was this victory party night where he held my hand, was very malambing and all… but nothing happened… next thing i know, a few months later, i heard may gf na sya
joan_g1014: that was the end until a few weeks back i got a quote
joan_g1014: i didn’t know who it was
joan_g1014: it was him ulit and he told me to save his number so ayun, we’re back in touch again but the thing is, what’s between us feels open-ended
lisa_simpson: im in shock here’s ur second chance
lisa_simpson: well do u still like him?
joan_g1014: its hard to distinguish between the remnants of the kilig before and what i feel now
joan_g1014: it could be that i just want closure kasi i just never really did anything
joan_g1014: pero im not looking to hook up with him… parang i just want him to know that before, i really liked him
lisa_simpson: e joan, think about it
lisa_simpson: if u tell him now that you had such strong feelings for him
lisa_simpson: think of whats going to happen next
lisa_simpson: naturally he just doesnt want to be in a platonic relationship with you kasi he found a way to revive your “friendship”
joan_g1014: i know… weird….i don’t know what i want to do
joan_g1014: definitely i’ll pick vince but as i said, what’s between us is open-ended, that i want some closure…ewan ko nga why i even feel that why
joan_g1014: i usually don’t drag out the past, lalo na ngayon but i can’t help but feel nostalgic—as i said, everything in my life’s going full circle or coming to a head
lisa_simpson: siguro nga kaya ka pa din ganyan kasi there was no closure
lisa_simpson: thats the danger when you have what ifs
lisa_simpson: and maybe ur not happy na din (im just assuming) thats why you’re reacting that way
joan_g1014: maybe i guess im just the type of person who wants everything neatly wrapped up, OC ika nga
joan_g1014: ikaw, what would you do?
lisa_simpson: i would assess first where i am with my bf
lisa_simpson: kasi the way you say it, parang di din naman ganon ka-ok relationship niyo e
lisa_simpson: as u said , ur occasionally happy
lisa_simpson: me kasi i take risks e
lisa_simpson: para sure ako, walang regrets
lisa_simpson: walang what ifs
lisa_simpson: that would kill me kasi
lisa_simpson: have you seen him na ba ulit?
joan_g1014: nope
joan_g1014: haven’t seen him in person
joan_g1014: and the funny thing is, same school kami
lisa_simpson: maybe when you see him, you’ll be more sure
joan_g1014: btw, sya yung isang guy i was talking about in my new post, knights in shining armor, hehehe
joan_g1014: or maybe i just want us to be good friends
lisa_simpson: hmmm i dont think so
lisa_simpson: somehow i think u still like him pero u cant have him or u dont want to have him
lisa_simpson: parang dream guy ganun
lisa_simpson: ur not a risk-taker no?
joan_g1014: hahahaha, well i am a risk taker when it comes to personal goals and ambitions
joan_g1014: but sobrang torpe ako in matters of the heart
joan_g1014: i get rattled easily, i don’t take risks nga pag matters of the heart
lisa_simpson: nyarks ingat ka
lisa_simpson: kasi u might end up just settling
joan_g1014: i hope not pero kasi he is this dream guy, exciting, cute, unattainable
